Back In the Day

I used to blog a lot back in the day where blogs weren't what they are today. Back then, I was a stay at home Mom to 3 kiddos under the age of 5. I needed an out. I needed a way to share. I needed a way to be heard.

Even crazier? I had begun to get offers to promote things, book, stationary, cloth diapers and to think what if I hadn't stopped? What if I hadn't let the big little voice of doubt come into my head and tell me "it will be too much, you will be too seen, it will get too big, what if you let these vendors down? What if you have to say no? What if, what if, what if....."

Because guess what I did then? I deleted it. I deleted the Facebook page for it, the Instagram for it, the Twitter for it, I deleted it all. The only thing I have left are snippets of the emails my subscribers would get, alerting them that I had a new post up. I have them all, and I go back to read the snippets and gosh I wish I could read the whole post! I have always loved to write, and what I wouldn't do to go back and read the whole dang post! Ah well, here we are :)

When I think about back in the day, I no longer do it with regret, with shame, guilt, anger...I look back at it as a very learning time in my life. I just didn't know I was learning yet. Yet....or maybe I knew I was learning, but I wasn't a willing pupil at the time (who says pupil anymore? Student, I mean student.)

Now I can go back with acceptance, love and admiration really - and I can ask myself "Ok what if I am too much? Too much for whom? And why does it matter to me so much? Processing that response. What if I am seen? What is the fear or worry here? Processing that a little more. What if what gets too big? My blog, my business, me?! Ok processing even more.....I can go on and on because it's exactly what I have been able to do with my Coaching journey. A journey I was so grateful for.

On many levels, I thought of being a Coach, way before a Coach was even what it is today. I just didn't move on it, listening to the big little voice of my old faithful friend Fear and Doubt. Why do I capitalize them? Because I have learned to respect the two, and all feelings actually. And I can say without a doubt that I didn't think I would reach this point in my life, not with my relationships, my children, my mind, MY LIFE. I have since graduated from Parent Coaching (more on that in another post) and I am 6 months into getting Mastery Method certified in the most intensive Coaching program that is life changing on the highest level. For me, it was about being able to be honest with my clients, current and future, that whatever tool we used to "get under the hood" - I had walked through as well. And I have - I really have. Every single one I applied to my life, myself and I did so with the intention to heal, to grow, and to share with each of you. I can't even begin to tell you in this one post how life changing and altering it has been for me. I will forever be grateful.

This blog will serve yet again, as a way for me to get out what is within me and share it with all of you reading. If it resonates, if it doesn't, that's ok. I am just grateful you are here, that you are reading and more importantly that you are potentially choosing to choose me as your Coach.

I'm not perfect, I'm human, and I'm the human that is sharing her own journey, so that whatever it may be that brought you here, you know you are not alone. Cliche to say, but let's just say, I mean it, with my whole heart.

Sending each of you love and light,

Erica